Nothing personal, just needs to be done...

[Seggy]

So this month I am paired with a brand new guy (FNG). Finished up IOE last week and was paired with me today for his first trip off IOE.

Anywho, to 'spice things up' a little bit, we decided to play a little bit of a prank on the FNG. So we started setting him up, last week of course.

I played football in college and still try to keep in shape (for the ladies). One thing I am big about is making sure that my crew and myself has plenty of hydration. Well, last week when I met this FNG, I had to give him a little speech about how, "in ground school, they don't teach you this, but it is important that you stay well hydrated with fluids as you go about your work day." Furthermore, the first officer and captain who we where to pick up the plane from today, also made it a very strong point to tell him that, "I am a great guy to fly with, but am extremely weird about hydration, and that it will take the FNG a while to figure out."

Anyway, we get to the airplane today and guess what, there was a suspicious looking bottle in row 9. I fly the Beech 1900 so no bathroom on board, also the flight from LGA to ALB this morning was during morning rush hour in LGA so they had a 45 minute taxi.

Elliott who was the first officer on the morning flight was given this suspicious looking Poland spring water bottle by myself filled with Diet Arizona Iced tea, which conveniently looks like urine as my FNG who I was flying with was doing his walk around. This is what transpired.

Elliott-Ahhhh FNG looks like someone had an accident in row 9

FNG (finishing the walkaround and boarding the airplane)-huh?

Elliott-looks like someone took a piss in a bottle in row 9, seniority rules, pick it up.

(I was 'chatting' to the gate agent. Really I was telling him to watch the FNGs reaction)

FNG-A few expletives

Seggy(boarding the airplane, looking confused)-What is going on here? Is there a problem.

FNG-SOMEONE TOOK A PISS IN A BOTTLE AND I HAVE TO PICK IT UP

Seggy-Don't be mad that is some great nourishment and source of hydration for us today (with that I go back to row 9, pick up the bottle and start talking some massive chugs from it, making sure I let some out of my mouth and drip down my face onto my shirt for some effect)

FNG-What are you doing?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!

Seggy-What does it look like I am doing? I am hydrating my body with 95% water and 5% minerals and vitamins. This is the original vitamin water.

FNG-A few expletive phrases that included questions about my sanity, or lack there of it, my health, bio hazard diseases, etc.

Seggy-I don't need to hear such language in a professional environment.

FNG-(looking like a guy who just saw a ghost) More expletives

At this point, the morning crew, who remember was in on it, gave the FNG the idea to call crew scheduling. So Jim the morning Captain said to the FNG

Jim-FNG you better call crew scheduling to ask to be removed from this trip, obviously you are uncomfortable flying with Seggy.

FNG-(Jim is already dialing crew scheduling) Good idea.

The FNG called crew scheduling and he was asked why he wanted to be removed from the trip, after a long pause they told him to call the chief pilot. At that point we told him it was unsweetened iced tea, and explained what happened to called scheduling who laughed their a$$es off.

So the FNGs nickname will be tinkles!

Nothing personal, but it had to be done!

[JEP]

That is so wrong, but Oh So Right!!!!!

[E_Dawg]

Pretty much the funniest thing I've heard all week

Nicely done.

[MQAAord]

That beats the time I got put in an ATR overhead!

That FNG is going to be telling that story for a long, long time.

[ComplexHiAv8r]

Although funny, not sure I would think that was funny in what should be a professional situation. Not exactly high school you know. Some companies (and maybe even yours) might get you called into a bosses office to discuss. What if he really decided to NOT fly with you, who would get a talk?

[Seggy]

This joke has been played on thousands of crew members for ages as well as 'collecting air samples', 'jumping up and down to lower the gear', 'checking the air pressure in the toilet'.

The FNG took it like a champ, even told his mom about it later!

This is something I am not worried about having to do the carpet dance for.

[sdfcvoh]

That is one of the funniest things I've heard in a long time. A little hazing (done correctly) goes a long way and makes people feel like part of the team. He'll be telling that story for the rest of his life.

Unless of course he's a dork, and you get called into the chief pilot's office next week.

[Polar742]

USA - 10
FIN - 10
SWE - 10
CAN - 10
FRA - 8.5

You can never count on them frenchies...

[MQAAord]

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

Although funny, not sure I would think that was funny in what should be a professional situation. Not exactly high school you know. Some companies (and maybe even yours) might get you called into a bosses office to discuss. What if he really decided to NOT fly with you, who would get a talk?

Generally "hazing" incidents like this are considered par for the airline course. As long as no one is injured, nothing is damaged, and it is not done in front of passengers.

Keep it in good fun, without physically hurting anyone or breaking anything, and without humiliating them in front of passengers.

[ComplexHiAv8r]

Originally Posted by Seggy

This joke has been played on thousands of crew members for ages as well as 'collecting air samples', 'jumping up and down to lower the gear', 'checking the air pressure in the toilet'.

The FNG took it like a champ, even told him mom about it later!

And that is fine right? Just because it has always been done. What about the first one that its NOT ok with? How about leaving a "PSA Special" in his flight bag? That sure is funny isnt it?? Sorry, I'm of the opion to leave the HS tricks in HS. I thought we were to be professionals?

[kellwolf]

Originally Posted by Seggy

This joke has been played on thousands of crew members for ages as well as 'collecting air samples', 'jumping up and down to lower the gear', 'checking the air pressure in the toilet'.

The FNG took it like a champ, even told his mom about it later!

This is something I am not worried about having to do the carpet dance for.

"Using the turbulence finder" (it's really the map light).

See, this is something you can do in the 1900 that makes no sense in an RJ.

Sorta like telling the FA that the felt part of the FO's hand mic is really a portable breathalyzer after faking an ACARS requesting she take a drug test while sneaking down to hit the TCAS test button. The real surprise is when it comes back and says "TCAS SYSTEM TEST.....FAIL." Oh man. She thought she was fired.

[kellwolf]

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

,

And that is fine right? Just because it has always been done. What about the first one that its NOT ok with? How about leaving a "PSA Special" in his flight bag? That sure is funny isnt it?? Sorry, I'm of the opion to leave the HS tricks in HS. I thought we were to be professionals?

Eh, lighten up, Francis.

We're not talking about someone taking a dump in someone's flight bag and snickering about it. That's crossing a line. Now, I think calling CS might have been taking it a bit far, but that's about it. Airline pilots are borderline nut jobs anyway. If we weren't we'd all go crazy.

[coa787]

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

Although funny, not sure I would think that was funny in what should be a professional situation. Not exactly high school you know. Some companies (and maybe even yours) might get you called into a bosses office to discuss. What if he really decided to NOT fly with you, who would get a talk?

I do agree, but you could always say that it was a joke before anyone actually picks up the phone.

[ComplexHiAv8r]

Originally Posted by kellwolf

Airline pilots are borderline nut jobs anyway. If we weren't we'd all go crazy.

That will go great on the evening news once this gets onto goggle search won't it??

[Polar742]

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

Although funny, not sure I would think that was funny in what should be a professional situation. Not exactly high school you know. Some companies (and maybe even yours) might get you called into a bosses office to discuss. What if he really decided to NOT fly with you, who would get a talk?

There's no crying in Freightdogging or the commuters...

Practical jokes make the job tolerable.

I mean the Speed of Heat. Seriously?

[Seggy]

Originally Posted by kellwolf

Now, I think calling CS might have been taking it a bit far, but that's about it. Airline pilots are borderline nut jobs anyway. If we weren't we'd all go crazy.

Humor is so freaking important in this industry. Humor actually diffuses tense situations, such as a brand new guy flying with a senior captain, trying to make a good impression, etc. He really did a good job today with a bunch of crap that was thrown our way later on in the day.

They loved it in the CS department as well. They work hard with what they have and they need to laugh and smile as well.

[tonyw]

If I ever get hired at a company that's going to write me up for playing a practical joke on someone, I'm going to quit.

You have to have fun with it. As long as nobody gets hurt, it's all good.

[Hernandezcfi]

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

And that is fine right? Just because it has always been done. What about the first one that its NOT ok with? How about leaving a "PSA Special" in his flight bag? That sure is funny isnt it?? Sorry, I'm of the opion to leave the HS tricks in HS. I thought we were to be professionals?

What the...

[firebirdswm]

Sounds like a great prank to me! Nothing was actually done to the FNG. He was just made to believe Seggy was crazy. I see no harm in that at all.

[ComplexHiAv8r]

Originally Posted by MQAAord

Generally "hazing" incidents like this are considered par for the airline course.

So "hazing" is ok??

Originally Posted by kellwolf

That's crossing a line.

Why is that crossing a line? What about putting panties or condoms in their luggage?

I know guys won't understand where I am coming from, and I am ok with some fun, but not at the expense of someone I would consider on my team. You can lighten a mood in ALOT of other ways.

[Hernandezcfi]

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

I know guys won't understand where I am coming from, and I am ok with some fun, but not at the expense of someone I would consider on my team. You can lighten a mood in ALOT of other ways.

You must have been ticked off if you got your shirt tail cut. Ruined a perfectly good shirt.

[tonyw]

Seriously, what Segs did is NOTHING compared to some of the hazing I've been exposed to.

[kellwolf]

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

So "hazing" is ok??



Why is that crossing a line? What about putting panties or condoms in their luggage?

Nah, it's not crossing the line b/c you didn't hurt anyone. Dropping a deuce in someone's flight bag, however, brings in all kinds of biohazard and sanitation issues. If the condoms were used, that's different.


If that happened here, worst case scenario with Seggy's case is you get called into the CP's office and he tries to keep a straight face as he says not to do it again.

[t-cart]

I would much rather fly with a crew like this as a newb, than a crew that had their panties all up in a wad. Anyday. Good one Seggy!

[ComplexHiAv8r]

Originally Posted by Hernandezcfi

You must have been ticked off if you got your shirt tail cut. Ruined a perfectly good shirt.

Great, now its gets personal......

Originally Posted by tonyw

Seriously, what Segs did is NOTHING compared to some of the hazing I've been exposed to.

Maybe, but where does it end??? Why should it be tolerated? Has anyone been to Harassment training?

Like I said, I knew you wouldn't understand my position.