Family Support

jermaine · November 14th, 2007, 12:56

I suffer from what I hear alot future pilots or current pilots suffer from. Especially young ones like me.

My problem is that my family doesnt take me serious that I would like to be a pilot one day. I hear stories from my grandparents telling me stuff about planes getting shot down in WW2. From my mother everytime we hear about a plane crashing or a accident somewhere see would still look at me and say "You still want to fly?".
I would say "yup." Then I have to listen lectures about how aviation is a true career and blah, blah, blah.
It doesnt really affect my decision much but still, it's kinda concerning. The school I plan to go to I would have to walk almost a mile to get to.
I actually done it a few times, so its not a biggie.

My question to y'all is did you ever problems trying to get the support from your family, or do just not care what they think.
Did you ever get that support?

Doug Taylor · November 14th, 2007, 13:02

You know, my parents were supportive. My father much more so than my mother.

The thought of me flying scared the bejezus out of my mother, but since my father was so gung-ho, she pretty much fell into line.

They may not be trying to hold you back with the comments after airplane crashes. They could be trying to see if you REALLY want to get into the profession despite the risks involved.

DAnbert · November 14th, 2007, 13:03

Quote:

Originally Posted by jermaine

The school I plan to go to I would have to walk almost a mile to get to.
I actually done it a few times, so its not a biggie.

I know this doesn't help too much but get a bicycle.

As for your family not liking it or pointing out every airline accident, you can counter with the old argument of "well I could get in a car accident driving to a job every day that I hate because I am busy looking to the sky to see what kind of plane someone else is flying overhead."

Good luck man. I know what it is like to want to please your family but ultimately you need to be happy with your career choice.

Best
DAnbert

charlie1017 · November 14th, 2007, 13:21

Hi Jermaine,

My parents actually discouraged me from becoming a pilot as a teen, saying that I should be an engineer or a doctor instead! It was in college that I was able to afford the flight training on my own and now after a couple of years I'm finally on my way to the commercial ticket. My advice for you would be to get a part time to get the flying going... If you can get a gig at your local airport FBO that would be great!
Now yet another bit of advice: don't skip college!!!!! Get the 4 year degree!!! If you want to get to a major you'll need it!
Now, go fly!

jrh · November 14th, 2007, 13:46

My parents were always super supportive of my aviation ambitions.

My mom still worries about me getting in a crash, but she worries about me no matter what I do. She's just like that. If I worked in an office she'd probably worry about me getting carpal tunnel syndrome or something.

Also, the amount of concern my mom has is directly linked to how new I am at something. She worried about my first solo, then I started flying solo all the time and she relaxed. She worried about me instructing, but after I worked a few months as a full time instructor, she relaxed.

So what I'm saying is, sometimes you just have to go for it, and hopefully your parents will see it's not as big of a deal as they think.

Another thing you might try would be to get them involved with aviation so they can see what "aviation culture" is like, as well. When I was a student pilot I got my mom to come along with me to the Oshkosh air show. For some reason it made her feel a lot better to see a bunch of crusty old men walking around, like it proves you can be a pilot and still live a long life.

My parents have also been impressed by the quality of people involved in aviation. I've gotten to fly a lot of trips with my dad as a passenger and he always gets a kick out of how honest, trusting, and helpful pilots are towards one another. Just little things...leaving pilot lounges unlocked 24/7, having a courtesy car free for the taking, etc. There are a lot of little details that pilots don't even notice after a while, but prove how pilots really do take care of each other. That's not something you see all the time in the "outside world." Pilots are like a huge family in many ways. Maybe if they saw that side of aviation they'd be more excited about you getting involved with those types of people.

But the bottom line is, if you really want to fly, go make it happen.

By the way, where are you from? Maybe somebody from here at JC could help you out, give you a ride, or something like that.

SoCalAprch · November 14th, 2007, 13:51

My parents didn't believe I could actually do it. My grandfather was a AF pilot in Vietnam and he used to always tell me that the only way to do it was the AF/NAVY route which isn't true anymore. Look at me now! Its alot easier to get to an airline job than it used to be and there are many routes you can take to get there. Its not the glorious job it used to be but if you love flying then its a good time for you. Prove to them that its safe and try not to get into debt doing it. Debt can ruin your feelings toward this career and is a problem in the industry. Its hard to start your life 50K in debt and only make 20K the first year at a regional. So plan plan plan... And most importantly stick to it and don't give up on it.

Also how old are you and what type of school is the one that is a mile from your house?

mtsu_av8er · November 14th, 2007, 13:52

My Mother was never very supportive of me and aviation. Honestly, she doesn't really even understand what I do . . .

N826AW · November 14th, 2007, 13:54

My parents weren't so supportive of my aviation pursuits. A few years ago I thought about getting my PPL and they told me to go get a well paying job and travel for fun.

But after spending a few years at a job making great money and being crapped out on life all the time, I decided to pursue it without their blessing or help. It wasn't until they came out to AZ over the summer and saw the extra bounce in my step that flying gives me that they turned around.

It helped that over the past couple of years my dad went through a major job change and my mom went back to school to get her degree and has begun teaching. Now they both understand the value of doing something you love.

charlie1017 · November 14th, 2007, 13:54

jrh's idea is excellent! Get them involved in the aviation world! For example, my wife thought flying was easy, like driving a car etc. Once I got her up in the air, her opinion changed forever. In the process she became more supportive and understanding of my career decision.
Good luck

moxiepilot · November 14th, 2007, 15:19

Whenever I heard disparraging comments on persuing flying I would respond that I could also just spend the money on hookers because I liked doing that as well...

jermaine · November 14th, 2007, 15:21

Thanks everybody.
I'm from Baltimore.
Currently in College for Culinary Arts maybe switching to IT or aerospace engineering. My mom also is a big worrier. See saw the kind of planes I be training in for my PPL. That kinda shocked her. Some smaller aircrafts Diamonds and older Cessnas.
So she is was worried. I'm probably going to take her up in one when when I get my license.

jtrain609 · November 14th, 2007, 15:22

My folks have been behind me for the most part with this career, and if they hadn't been? I'm a hardcore enough SOB with enough piss and vinegar in me that I'd find a way to make it work no matter how much or little support they gave me. If you want it, you'll find a way to make it happen.

Now support from my fiance? She's probably been there supporting me more than anybody with this gig these days, and it means a ton that she's there. If you're in a relationship and your SO isn't right behind you pushing you then you're hosed.

Doug Taylor · November 14th, 2007, 15:25

You know, my mom never realized exactly what I did until she took her first flight in an airplane last year.

Flew AMERICA WEST even, how's that for loyalty?

"I didn't realize you did THAT! That's a lot of responsibility!"

But people can be weird sometimes. I can fly Kristie to Europe but she'll still backseat drive me when I'm in a car.

jtrain609 · November 14th, 2007, 15:33

The first time I got Emily in an airplane (when she barely knew me) she thought we were gonna have a gear up landing. I mean I kinda caused her to think that one on accident, but I was surprised when she got in a plane with me again.

charlie1017 · November 14th, 2007, 15:34

Hey Doug and the pros here...

Ever had the feeling or urge to "backseat drive" while non-reving, especially when jumpseating in a type of plane you've flown?

Sorry for the hijack of the thread

Doug Taylor · November 14th, 2007, 15:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlie1017

Hey Doug and the pros here...

Ever had the feeling or urge to "backseat drive" while non-reving, especially when jumpseating in a type of plane you've flown?

Sorry for the hijack of the thread

Me? Not really. However I've flown the mad dog for so long, I could sense when the pilots got behind the ball a little.

jtrain609 · November 14th, 2007, 15:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlie1017

Hey Doug and the pros here...

Ever had the feeling or urge to "backseat drive" while non-reving, especially when jumpseating in a type of plane you've flown?

Sorry for the hijack of the thread

Not a chance. My mouth stays shut unless they're asking for advice or if they're going to bend metal. Not doing something the way I do it? That's cool, happens every day.

charlie1017 · November 14th, 2007, 15:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtrain609

Not a chance. My mouth stays shut unless they're asking for advice or if they're going to bend metal. Not doing something the way I do it? That's cool, happens every day.

Thanks. I figure that's part of jumpseating respect and manners

.

BobDDuck · November 14th, 2007, 16:16

I tend not to backseat driver when I'm non reving. I don't know enough about most planes other then the one I fly to even have a clue what is going on. If I am flying in the CRJ I may wonder about the technique that are using up front, but I don't ever question the safety. Granted, there are a few times where I know who is flying and I brace myself for the landing.

jrh · November 14th, 2007, 16:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlie1017

Thanks. I figure that's part of jumpseating respect and manners

.

Not just jumpseating...it applies to flying with other pilots, in general. Even in little Cessnas.

charlie1017 · November 14th, 2007, 16:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by jrh

Not just jumpseating...it applies to flying with other pilots, in general. Even in little Cessnas.

X1000

JaceTheAce · November 14th, 2007, 16:22

My parents and grandparents were extremely supportive. But, I come from a family with a lot of pilots. Being a 3rd generation pilot (father and father's father), I don't think my dad would've objected!

Every time an airplane crashes just point out to them every time there's a car crash being reported on the news. Regardless of what other people think, you should be able to ignore their inhibitions and follow your dream.

mtsu_av8er · November 14th, 2007, 19:01

Quote:

Originally Posted by jtrain609

If you're in a relationship and your SO isn't right behind you pushing you then you're hosed.

No, maybe the relationship is . . . but he can do just fine still!!

Maximillian_Jenius · November 14th, 2007, 20:44

My mom has always been supportive, she has always said find something you love and do it. No matter if it is a doctor, or a starving artist, just get a college education.

She's always been supportive in both the emotional support and financial aspect of my dreams and career.

When I finally realize my dream I'll be the only one in my family with a technical job, all of my family have jobs in the service industry.

My moms a teacher/psychologist, my aunt a nurse along with my cousin, several cousins, my sister and my uncle are social workers, and a cousin is a lawyer, just for some quick example.

TheOneMarine · November 14th, 2007, 22:54

My mom is VERY supportive. She's always been supportive of anything I set my mind to really. My dad however (22 year Army officer) thinks its a joke because he doesn't know anything about it. I'm a CFI and he still thinks its a phase like working at McDonalds. But, you do what you love and prove to them that its the real deal. Walking that mile to the airport sounds to me like a good way of paying your dues bud. Hope that helps a little

November 14th, 2007, 12:56	#1
jermaine Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 33	Family Support I suffer from what I hear alot future pilots or current pilots suffer from. Especially young ones like me. My problem is that my family doesnt take me serious that I would like to be a pilot one day. I hear stories from my grandparents telling me stuff about planes getting shot down in WW2. From my mother everytime we hear about a plane crashing or a accident somewhere see would still look at me and say "You still want to fly?". I would say "yup." Then I have to listen lectures about how aviation is a true career and blah, blah, blah. It doesnt really affect my decision much but still, it's kinda concerning. The school I plan to go to I would have to walk almost a mile to get to. I actually done it a few times, so its not a biggie. My question to y'all is did you ever problems trying to get the support from your family, or do just not care what they think. Did you ever get that support? Last edited by jermaine; November 14th, 2007 at 12:58. Reason: some spelling

November 14th, 2007, 13:02	#2
Doug Taylor Agent Smith Join Date: Dec 1969 Location: KSDL Posts: 41,926 Blog Entries: 1	Re: Family Support You know, my parents were supportive. My father much more so than my mother. The thought of me flying scared the bejezus out of my mother, but since my father was so gung-ho, she pretty much fell into line. They may not be trying to hold you back with the comments after airplane crashes. They could be trying to see if you REALLY want to get into the profession despite the risks involved. __________________ Doug Taylor http://76school.flyblog.com (old!) http://30west.flyblog.com (updated 11/28)

November 14th, 2007, 13:21	#4
charlie1017 Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Cambridge, MA Posts: 417	Re: Family Support Hi Jermaine, My parents actually discouraged me from becoming a pilot as a teen, saying that I should be an engineer or a doctor instead! It was in college that I was able to afford the flight training on my own and now after a couple of years I'm finally on my way to the commercial ticket. My advice for you would be to get a part time to get the flying going... If you can get a gig at your local airport FBO that would be great! Now yet another bit of advice: don't skip college!!!!! Get the 4 year degree!!! If you want to get to a major you'll need it! Now, go fly!

November 14th, 2007, 13:46	#5
jrh Old Skool Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: USA Posts: 1,769	Re: Family Support My parents were always super supportive of my aviation ambitions. My mom still worries about me getting in a crash, but she worries about me no matter what I do. She's just like that. If I worked in an office she'd probably worry about me getting carpal tunnel syndrome or something. Also, the amount of concern my mom has is directly linked to how new I am at something. She worried about my first solo, then I started flying solo all the time and she relaxed. She worried about me instructing, but after I worked a few months as a full time instructor, she relaxed. So what I'm saying is, sometimes you just have to go for it, and hopefully your parents will see it's not as big of a deal as they think. Another thing you might try would be to get them involved with aviation so they can see what "aviation culture" is like, as well. When I was a student pilot I got my mom to come along with me to the Oshkosh air show. For some reason it made her feel a lot better to see a bunch of crusty old men walking around, like it proves you can be a pilot and still live a long life. My parents have also been impressed by the quality of people involved in aviation. I've gotten to fly a lot of trips with my dad as a passenger and he always gets a kick out of how honest, trusting, and helpful pilots are towards one another. Just little things...leaving pilot lounges unlocked 24/7, having a courtesy car free for the taking, etc. There are a lot of little details that pilots don't even notice after a while, but prove how pilots really do take care of each other. That's not something you see all the time in the "outside world." Pilots are like a huge family in many ways. Maybe if they saw that side of aviation they'd be more excited about you getting involved with those types of people. But the bottom line is, if you really want to fly, go make it happen. By the way, where are you from? Maybe somebody from here at JC could help you out, give you a ride, or something like that.

November 14th, 2007, 13:51	#6
SoCalAprch Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: CMH Posts: 876	Re: Family Support My parents didn't believe I could actually do it. My grandfather was a AF pilot in Vietnam and he used to always tell me that the only way to do it was the AF/NAVY route which isn't true anymore. Look at me now! Its alot easier to get to an airline job than it used to be and there are many routes you can take to get there. Its not the glorious job it used to be but if you love flying then its a good time for you. Prove to them that its safe and try not to get into debt doing it. Debt can ruin your feelings toward this career and is a problem in the industry. Its hard to start your life 50K in debt and only make 20K the first year at a regional. So plan plan plan... And most importantly stick to it and don't give up on it. Also how old are you and what type of school is the one that is a mile from your house? __________________ I approve this message.

November 14th, 2007, 13:52	#7
mtsu_av8er Old Skool Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Utopia Posts: 12,590	Re: Family Support My Mother was never very supportive of me and aviation. Honestly, she doesn't really even understand what I do . . . __________________ Ike is one nasty storm, and it's all the fault of management. That's why we need ALPA.

November 14th, 2007, 13:54	#8
N826AW Old Skool Join Date: May 2007 Location: Mesa Oeste Posts: 1,921	Re: Family Support My parents weren't so supportive of my aviation pursuits. A few years ago I thought about getting my PPL and they told me to go get a well paying job and travel for fun. But after spending a few years at a job making great money and being crapped out on life all the time, I decided to pursue it without their blessing or help. It wasn't until they came out to AZ over the summer and saw the extra bounce in my step that flying gives me that they turned around. It helped that over the past couple of years my dad went through a major job change and my mom went back to school to get her degree and has begun teaching. Now they both understand the value of doing something you love. __________________ "The Do"

November 14th, 2007, 13:54	#9
charlie1017 Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Cambridge, MA Posts: 417	Re: Family Support jrh's idea is excellent! Get them involved in the aviation world! For example, my wife thought flying was easy, like driving a car etc. Once I got her up in the air, her opinion changed forever. In the process she became more supportive and understanding of my career decision. Good luck

November 14th, 2007, 15:19	#10
moxiepilot Old Skool Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: CFI / CFII in PA Posts: 2,742	Re: Family Support Whenever I heard disparraging comments on persuing flying I would respond that I could also just spend the money on hookers because I liked doing that as well...

November 14th, 2007, 15:21	#11
jermaine Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 33	Re: Family Support Thanks everybody. I'm from Baltimore. Currently in College for Culinary Arts maybe switching to IT or aerospace engineering. My mom also is a big worrier. See saw the kind of planes I be training in for my PPL. That kinda shocked her. Some smaller aircrafts Diamonds and older Cessnas. So she is was worried. I'm probably going to take her up in one when when I get my license.

November 14th, 2007, 15:22	#12
jtrain609 Old Skool Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Park City, UT Posts: 12,869	Re: Family Support My folks have been behind me for the most part with this career, and if they hadn't been? I'm a hardcore enough SOB with enough piss and vinegar in me that I'd find a way to make it work no matter how much or little support they gave me. If you want it, you'll find a way to make it happen. Now support from my fiance? She's probably been there supporting me more than anybody with this gig these days, and it means a ton that she's there. If you're in a relationship and your SO isn't right behind you pushing you then you're hosed. __________________ "Jetlink 2940, on another radio, contact clearance for new airways..."

November 14th, 2007, 15:25	#13
Doug Taylor Agent Smith Join Date: Dec 1969 Location: KSDL Posts: 41,926 Blog Entries: 1	Re: Family Support You know, my mom never realized exactly what I did until she took her first flight in an airplane last year. Flew AMERICA WEST even, how's that for loyalty? "I didn't realize you did THAT! That's a lot of responsibility!" But people can be weird sometimes. I can fly Kristie to Europe but she'll still backseat drive me when I'm in a car. __________________ Doug Taylor http://76school.flyblog.com (old!) http://30west.flyblog.com (updated 11/28)

November 14th, 2007, 15:33	#14
jtrain609 Old Skool Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Park City, UT Posts: 12,869	Re: Family Support The first time I got Emily in an airplane (when she barely knew me) she thought we were gonna have a gear up landing. I mean I kinda caused her to think that one on accident, but I was surprised when she got in a plane with me again. __________________ "Jetlink 2940, on another radio, contact clearance for new airways..."

November 14th, 2007, 15:34	#15
charlie1017 Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Cambridge, MA Posts: 417	Re: Family Support Hey Doug and the pros here... Ever had the feeling or urge to "backseat drive" while non-reving, especially when jumpseating in a type of plane you've flown? Sorry for the hijack of the thread

November 14th, 2007, 16:16	#19
BobDDuck Old Skool Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Left Seat Posts: 5,924	Re: Family Support I tend not to backseat driver when I'm non reving. I don't know enough about most planes other then the one I fly to even have a clue what is going on. If I am flying in the CRJ I may wonder about the technique that are using up front, but I don't ever question the safety. Granted, there are a few times where I know who is flying and I brace myself for the landing. __________________ TBJC08 The Gear Monkey The Gear Monkey Store

November 14th, 2007, 16:22	#22
JaceTheAce Old Skool Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: San Diego Posts: 7,544	Re: Family Support My parents and grandparents were extremely supportive. But, I come from a family with a lot of pilots. Being a 3rd generation pilot (father and father's father), I don't think my dad would've objected! Every time an airplane crashes just point out to them every time there's a car crash being reported on the news. Regardless of what other people think, you should be able to ignore their inhibitions and follow your dream. __________________ "Time spent flying is not deducted from one's lifespan." Join the Impact - Protest Prop 8 on November 15th!

November 14th, 2007, 20:44	#24
Maximillian_Jenius Old Skool Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: KPHX, KFFZ, KIWA Posts: 19,231	Re: Family Support My mom has always been supportive, she has always said find something you love and do it. No matter if it is a doctor, or a starving artist, just get a college education. She's always been supportive in both the emotional support and financial aspect of my dreams and career. When I finally realize my dream I'll be the only one in my family with a technical job, all of my family have jobs in the service industry. My moms a teacher/psychologist, my aunt a nurse along with my cousin, several cousins, my sister and my uncle are social workers, and a cousin is a lawyer, just for some quick example. __________________ Rear Admiral www.gayviator.com Maximillian Pegasus

November 14th, 2007, 22:54	#25
TheOneMarine Senior Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: If it isn't ORL, I'm not happy :( Posts: 655	Re: Family Support My mom is VERY supportive. She's always been supportive of anything I set my mind to really. My dad however (22 year Army officer) thinks its a joke because he doesn't know anything about it. I'm a CFI and he still thinks its a phase like working at McDonalds. But, you do what you love and prove to them that its the real deal. Walking that mile to the airport sounds to me like a good way of paying your dues bud. Hope that helps a little __________________ -Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

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