BABIES

[TheWife]

Originally Posted by 970Flyer

My advise is to let your wife do whatever she wants with that room. If you argue with her you will lose, so man-up and buy her that $500 glider.

AMEN Brotha!! Nursery is PINK territory. Garage/Backyard is BLUE territory. Don't cross into the wrong territory. If my husband had FORBIDDEN me from decorating the nursery or buying a glider, he would have lost a testicle. I've spent the last 6 years snuggling, rocking, and telling stories to my kids in that glider in the nursery. As much time as the mom spends in there, she better dang well be comfortable in it.

Most important: Be supportive. Help with absolutely everything and anything. Don't just "ask" if she needs help, do it before she has to ask. The old-school redneck "raising the kids is the woman's job" attitude is gone, or at least on the way out. Don't be that *ickhead dad/husband who never helps out.

Amen times infinity!!! P.S. Taking care of the kids w/o asking is considered foreplay. The more foreplay you do the more play you're likely to get.

[SeatClutcher]

Originally Posted by TheWife

P.S. Taking care of the kids w/o asking is considered foreplay. The more foreplay you do the more play you're likely to get.

I don't understand why having to ask is even an issue.

That there seems to be a need to tell dads to "help" raise their own children seems wrong... First of all, it shouldn't be called "help" - it should simply be half of the responsibility, no?

[TheWife]

I agree there shouldn't be a need to ask, and it's not considered help, it's considered doing your share. I get really bugged when people ask my husband "oh you're babysitting tonight?" NO, that's what you do for someone ELSE'S kids. Men seem to be conditioned though, to think that their duty day ends when they clock out at work and women have been conditioned to think that any "help" is so above and beyond what should be expected of men. Some men consider it "help" to take their own dinner plate to the sink. Pretty sad IMO. But that's why when you have a man that does his share without having to be nagged to do it, it feels like foreplay!

[Velocipede]

Its definitely a pleasure/pain thing. I'm with Qgar, mine are in college/teenagers, too. The saddest time of the entire experience was when they discovered that Santa Claus wasn't real.

It occured to me that was the first episode in many losses of innocence in their lives.
It kind of broke me up.

But, all in all, its a great experience as long as you don't fall into today's "Parent Trap".

Repeat after me..."My kid will never be a professional athlete in ANY sport."

If you just remember that, you can enjoy your time at the field/pitch/rink/gym with them and not turn into a screaming, idiotic, MeeMee.

Keep after them about their academics because there's about 1000 times more scholarship money for brains as there is for athletics.

[ZapBrannigan]

Agreed on the car seat. Purchase the best one you can afford. Spare no expense. We got the Britax Boulevard. It's good from when he was an infant through 80 pounds so we intend to use it for a while. Amazon.com has them for around $280.

I am cheap -- i'm the first to admit it. But when it comes to the safety of my family I spare no expense.

PS - I also agree that athletics are WAAAAY overemphasized in public schools. If he wants to play sports fine. But it's called "play" for a reason. If his GPA drops below a pre-agreed level, he's done. My wife taught math and music in a previous life. We both love art, theater, and music.

I hope he will find joy in whatever he does in school be it jock, band-geek, artist, actor, scholar, or member of the robotics club.

[pullup]

Originally Posted by mtsu_av8er

I've been an owner for many years, Ian.

Don't do it.

That is all.

You're a pocket full of sunshine now! I actually feel sorry for your kid(s). I know you'll tell me you always took care of them, put a roof over their head, fed them, etc. but did you actually care for them?

All I know is I will never do anything as meaningful and fulfilling as raising my kids. Nothing. Have fun with it, GET INVOLVED, and ENJOY THEM.

[Lee D]

Originally Posted by Qgar

Just my .02....most of you guys and girls have babies and young children. Mine are teenagers and all I can say is ENJOY THE TODDLER/CHILD STAGE!!! Seriously, you have no idea how rewarding it is to see them go from totally dependent beings to intelligent, caring young men and women. The physical changes are shocking and this sounds stupid, but almost seems magical. I'll never forget calling the house one day and asking the male on the other end, "Who's this!" It was my son! His voice seemed to change overnight. The first "peach fuzz" over his lip and hair on his chest/legs was the door opening to his becoming a young man. Need I even tell you what it's like to watach your daughter's body "blossoming" as well?! If you think watching your baby's first step or them uttering their first word is mind-blowing--wait until those wonderful puberty years!

Oh, and do you know how you worry about your child's safety now? Imagine the fun of watching them go off on their own for the first time (to a movie/shopping, etc.) Or, venturing into Manhattan with friends or getting in a car with a friend, or getting their driver's license (son's waiting for his road test early next month). You know you have to "let go" to some degree--but it sure isn't easy.

My oldest is 12 and a girl. We are currently assuming the brace position for all the things you have mentioned. We are scared.

Kids are great, but like they said in Jurasic Park, they epitomize chaos theory. Sometimes there's no real way to predict what they are going to do from one moment to the next. . . . .but I would not trade them for anything!

[Lee D]

Originally Posted by ZapBrannigan

PS - I also agree that athletics are WAAAAY overemphasized in public schools. If he wants to play sports fine. But it's called "play" for a reason. If his GPA drops below a pre-agreed level, he's done. My wife taught math and music in a previous life. We both love art, theater, and music.

I hope he will find joy in whatever he does in school be it jock, band-geek, artist, actor, scholar, or member of the robotics club.

Holy cow athletics are getting so expensive too!! Just to have a decent shot at a high school team you have to play in local leagues, pay the fees, go to camps, pay the fees. I know parents who devote large portions of income to their children's athletics. And I'm not talking about $100 here and there. More into the thousands.

[NotCoolEnufToFly]

Originally Posted by MQAAord

My only suggestion of something not to buy second-hand is a carseat, unless you know the original owner and KNOW for a fact it's never been in a wreck and is under 5 years old. Plastics age & degrade with age, it's recommended not to use one that is more than 5 years old. My sister-in-law gave me her old infant seat, but I knew it's history so I felt okay using that. From a stranger, you just never know.......

My mom's friend's daughter is having her third baby and in Arkansas they won't even let you leave the hospital with your baby unless it's a brand new carseat because of the deterioration. She tried to take her carseat from her last baby who is only about 2 when she thought she was going into labor last week and when they released her they told her to make sure she got a new carseat before the real deal.

Originally Posted by skidz

Relax. Do what comes naturally...get the beer and remote, put the feet up and enjoy the game

Easily said at 10 weeks gestation.

[mtsu_av8er]

Originally Posted by Hernandezcfi

I have three. They substantially slow career progression. They will cost you alot of money. Babies are the most selfish creatures on earth!

There is a lot of truth to your statements . . .

[MQAAord]

Originally Posted by NotCoolEnufToFly

My mom's friend's daughter is having her third baby and in Arkansas they won't even let you leave the hospital with your baby unless it's a brand new carseat because of the deterioration. She tried to take her carseat from her last baby who is only about 2 when she thought she was going into labor last week and when they released her they told her to make sure she got a new carseat before the real deal.

Oh wow! Our infant carrier was used by 3 babies! Bill's nephew (who it was bought new for), and our two for a few months apiece. (Total time used, 3 years.)

Babies grow out of those infant seats so quick....... our oldest was in his for 8 months, our little guy for 6 months. They could have stayed in it longer but it was getting heavy so we just put them in regular carseats then. Britax Marathons Our big guy just graduated to a Britax Monarch booster seat last month! He was getting too tall for his Marathon. I loved how that seat went from 5 lbs to 60 lbs. I think our little guy will be in his for quite a while though, he's so little!

If I had it to do again, I'd buy the Britax infant seat. But thankfully I won't have to do that again!

[X-Forces]

Originally Posted by ZapBrannigan

Lots of mobiles can be found at consignment shops for pennies on the dollar.

The guy is wondering how much it's going to cost to have a baby folks. Give him suggestions for how to do it on the cheap.

You are 100% right on that one.

I can't tell you how much stuff of our kid's we have gotten from consignments store, Goodwill, etc that was actually brand new!
Tags still on it.

Don't fall for the kid's cloths trap! Have a few nice outfits, of course, but other then that go as cheap as possible!

This way when they grow out of it in 3 months, and the worn an outfit once or twice, it doesn't break your heart when you give it away.

[MQAAord]

eBay.

You can get good quality stuff that won't shrink beyond use or fall apart after a couple wearings for a fraction of the price of new.



I was lucky enough to get a TON of clothes hand-me-down from Bill's sister as her little guy who is a year older than my oldest grows out of them. She buys nice stuff, Gap, Hilfiger, etc, and it has held up through the washings & wearings and abuse of *3* little boys now.

[NotCoolEnufToFly]

Originally Posted by MQAAord

Oh wow! Our infant carrier was used by 3 babies! Bill's nephew (who it was bought new for), and our two for a few months apiece. (Total time used, 3 years.)

Babies grow out of those infant seats so quick....... our oldest was in his for 8 months, our little guy for 6 months. They could have stayed in it longer but it was getting heavy so we just put them in regular carseats then. Britax Marathons Our big guy just graduated to a Britax Monarch booster seat last month! He was getting too tall for his Marathon. I loved how that seat went from 5 lbs to 60 lbs. I think our little guy will be in his for quite a while though, he's so little!

If I had it to do again, I'd buy the Britax infant seat. But thankfully I won't have to do that again!

I'm not sure if it's all of Arkansas or just that area but it's a new thing there anyways.

[TheWife]

That's terrible because even the sponsors of all the car seat safety information say an infant carrier is good for 5 years. And considering they generally go to a specific stroller, that would mean you'd probably have to get a new stroller as well. They are going to start seeing a rise in home deliveries if they threaten to not let you take your own child if your infant seat isn't brand new.

[surfCRQ]

i don't like babies. I like when people with babies give me financial advise because they have already made the worst decision possible. and they poop alot.

[NotCoolEnufToFly]

Originally Posted by TheWife

That's terrible because even the sponsors of all the car seat safety information say an infant carrier is good for 5 years. And considering they generally go to a specific stroller, that would mean you'd probably have to get a new stroller as well. They are going to start seeing a rise in home deliveries if they threaten to not let you take your own child if your infant seat isn't brand new.

I agree. I was quite shocked. Luckily, I won't be giving birth in Arkansas, not that I have a used baby carseat anyways

[Doug Taylor]

Originally Posted by surfCRQ

i don't like babies. I like when people with babies give me financial advise because they have already made the worst decision possible. and they poop alot.

Well, it's that high fiber baby food!

[Kristie]

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned garage sales yet!! you can get some of the BEST, slightly used big items at garage sales....All it takes is a little scrubbing and it's all clean.

Altho not a mom, i would LOVE a glider...those chairs are the bombdiggity and they always put my nephew Lawson to sleep when i was taking care of him. SO much easier than an actual rocking chair.

[USMCmech]

A few more tips I thought of:

Don't buy a "changing table". Any countertop will do just fine. Buy the pad, and some covers, and a section of the rubber no slip foam used in RVs and boats. The foam will keep the pad from slipping anywhere. I esspecially like the top of the dryer.

In order to preserve your dignity, don't let your wife buy a "girly" diaper bag (or at least get your own). I got a Craftsman fish mouth style tool bag which worked great. Added bonus, when your kid out grows diapers, you've got a nice tool carrier.

Learn to pack light. 4 diapers, wipes, sippy cup, extra outfit, 2 toys, and some goldfish + your best Mcgyver ingenuity. That should get you through 95% of the trips out and will easliy fit in your Craftsman diaper bag.

I far prefer having my kids ride on my shoulders over any stroller.

You WILL drop/bang into/hit/step on your kids. We all have, so will you. Still, the first time you step on your kids fingers with boots, you're still gonna feel like dirt.

When the kids is screaming his head of at 2400, go to Wal Mart (or any other 24hr store) and let your wife get some sleep.

Take plenty of pictures.

When out at a restraunt, ask the waiter for about 6 spoons. They'll get you through till the appetizers.

Now is your excuse to act like an idiot and get away with it, enjoy.

Small double box end wrenches make good teething toys.

Don't use lifejackets in pools.

DO use lifejactes in ponds, creeks, lakes, or rivers.

Learn to see the symptoms of low blood sugar. Ocasionally my kids would wake after a long nap in a completely foul mood, if they had a lot of sugary stuf before they would be crashing. Once I figured out what was the problem and shoved some M&Ms in their mouth they were OK. Then follow it up with some PB&J with extra PB.

[X-Forces]

Originally Posted by surfCRQ

i don't like babies. I like when people with babies give me financial advise because they have already made the worst decision possible. and they poop alot.

I love it when people without kids try to convince others, but mostly themselves, that having children is a bad idea.

Most parents, real parents that is, embrace the idea that there are more important things in life then money, namely family.

[sschlesinger]

DON'T DO IT!!!!! Just joking I have three kids (all girls) with the newest only 2 months old. Having kids has really made me a better and nicer person. I love playing with them and watching them grow and explore, when u have a kid you will understand what I mean.

[mtsu_av8er]

Originally Posted by X-Forces

Most parents, real parents that is, embrace the idea that there are more important things in life then money, namely family.

Not all real parents embrace this idea.

[JEP]

Originally Posted by USMCmech

A few more tips I thought of:

......
Don't use lifejackets in pools.

.......

Do tell, that's one I have not heard...Both of my monkeys wore lifejackets until they could touch in the shallow end.....

[TheWife]

I was wondering as well, my kids are in them near any kind of water, pools included.