The Things Kids Say......

JEP · May 29th, 2007, 22:38

my 9 yr old as I am telling him for the umpteenth time to get his teeth brushed for bedtime.......

him: "Dad, Are you gay?"

me: "WHAT?"

him: "Not that kind of gay? The happy kind of gay..." Geez, Dad!

ComplexHiAv8r · May 30th, 2007, 08:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by JEP

my 9 yr old as I am telling him for the umpteenth time to get his teeth brushed for bedtime.......

him: "Dad, Are you gay?"

me: "WHAT?"

him: "Not that kind of gay? The happy kind of gay..." Geez, Dad!

Now your son is questioning your manhood?????? Sure, he meant in a happy way!!

JEP · May 30th, 2007, 09:37

Quote:

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

Now your son is questioning your manhood?????? Sure, he meant in a happy way!!

he KNEW I was not happy so he was trying to play his little word games.....The little devil..........I hope when and if he has kids.......they are exactly like him!

Now where have I heard that before.....

Chris_Ford · May 30th, 2007, 11:59

Sounds like you have a Chris Jr!!!!!!!!

ready2fly · May 30th, 2007, 13:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by JEP

my 9 yr old as I am telling him for the umpteenth time to get his teeth brushed for bedtime.......

him: "Dad, Are you gay?"

me: "WHAT?"

him: "Not that kind of gay? The happy kind of gay..." Geez, Dad!

Yup. Already learning to watch what I say in front of my 2.25 year old son:

Mrs R2F (talking about work): ....and to top it off, they're delaying our bonuses until November.

Me: Bastards.

R2F2: Baaaaasssstaaaards. Bastards bastards bastards bastards baaaastards bastards bastards.......

gna_in_lgb · May 30th, 2007, 13:29

My friend has an eight year-old daughter and a few weeks ago she had a slumber party to celebrate her birthday.

So while my friend was preparing some snacks, one of the girls asked her "Ann-Marie, why don't you have a husband" and Ann-Marie's daughter answered "my mom doesn't have a husband because she likes to make all the decisions around here". Eight years old and already has marriage figured out.

TheWife · May 30th, 2007, 16:43

My 5 year old has been asking for "uppers". We'll be walking around the grocery store and he'll say "mom, I'm tired, I need some uppers". Luckily I figured out what he meant cause that sounded bad...apparently, that's what he calls crutches, he thinks it would be fun to have some crutches and not have to walk and get your feet tired.

He also had a talk with my husband once about the tattoo on his ankle. My husband's "brilliant" reply "no, I didn't draw on myself, a guy with a sharp needle and some ink drew on daddy and it's never coming off and it really hurt." A few months later, my son asked "mom, when I'm a daddy, is someone going to draw on me with a needle?" and I said "no, because you are going to the make the right choices and not get a tattoo". (Don't flame for being anti-tattoo, I'm not, but when you are talking to a 5 year old well.....) So a few days later, we are driving home and see a guy getting arrested, and he asks why, and I tell him that the guy made some wrong choices, and he says "did he get a tattoo?" Guess I'm going to have to word things better in the future!

JEP · May 30th, 2007, 18:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by ready2fly

Yup. Already learning to watch what I say in front of my 2.25 year old son:

Mrs R2F (talking about work): ....and to top it off, they're delaying our bonuses until November.

Me: Bastards.

R2F2: Baaaaasssstaaaards. Bastards bastards bastards bastards baaaastards bastards bastards.......

I hear ya R2F.....

You know you have to watch your words when........

Scene: sitting at a red light

2.5 yr old: Dad, honk your horn.

me: no AJ, we don't honk at a red light.

2.5 yr old: when do you beep your horn?

me: when someone doesn't see me or when they cut me off in traffic, almost causing an accident.

2.5 yr old: Yeah, that's it. Honk two times and then say jack A$$.

me:

Maximillian_Jenius · May 30th, 2007, 20:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by JEP

my 9 yr old as I am telling him for the umpteenth time to get his teeth brushed for bedtime.......

him: "Dad, Are you gay?"

me: "WHAT?"

him: "Not that kind of gay? The happy kind of gay..." Geez, Dad!

Lol, maybe you need a man bag!

JEP · May 30th, 2007, 22:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maximillian_Jenius

Lol, maybe you need a man bag!

Dude, I had a man bag when I was in the Navy. No ####!

ComplexHiAv8r · May 30th, 2007, 22:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by JEP

Dude, I had a man bag when I was in the Navy. No ####!

I thought what happened in the Navy, stayed in the Navy!

JEP · June 1st, 2007, 03:17

Quote:

Originally Posted by ComplexHiAv8r

I thought what happened in the Navy, stayed in the Navy!

The stories are better in person, BUT the only time I see you my wife is with me.....It was ll pre-marriage of course, but........

Doug Taylor · June 1st, 2007, 03:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by JEP

my 9 yr old as I am telling him for the umpteenth time to get his teeth brushed for bedtime.......

him: "Dad, Are you gay?"

me: "WHAT?"

him: "Not that kind of gay? The happy kind of gay..." Geez, Dad!

Reminds me of a funny story from a couple years ago.

Me and the captain had a layover in LAS. He's not a beer drinker but offered to buy me a drink so we walked a next door to another hotel with a stellar wine offering.

So we're sharing a bottle of pinot noir and there happens to be on the television, the winter olympic's ice skating competition.

My telephone rings and it's Kristie, she asks, "Whatchya doin?"

"Oh, drinking a pinot noir watching ice dancing with the captain"

"Really? Is he gay?"

"Hey Jim, my wife is wondering if you're gay."

"Nope!"

"No, the captain's not gay, hon"

"But that is! Don't do that again, that's just weird!"

staplegun · June 1st, 2007, 12:06

This happened when son #1 was in 3rd or 4th grade:

I'm on a trip and son #1 comes home from school and asks the wife, "Mom, are you and dad ever going to get divorced?"

The wife launches into a long, philosophical treatise on marriage, relationships and the vagaries of life, ending with, "so, no, I dont think we're ever going to get divorced..."

Son says, "Oh" with a dazed look on his face...

I come home the next day and get the same question; "Dad, are you and Mom ever going to get divorced?"

"No."

"OK, thanks..." and he runs off to play.

The wife tells me of her conversation and admits she had blown it, she was tired and he caught her off-guard.

All he wanted to hear was that we were OK...

Sometimes the simplest answer is the best. Even though my wife's was more "honest," it wasn't what a 4th grader needed to hear...

Kevin

Minnesota_Flyer · June 2nd, 2007, 10:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doug Taylor

Reminds me of a funny story from a couple years ago.

Me and the captain had a layover in LAS. He's not a beer drinker but offered to buy me a drink so we walked a next door to another hotel with a stellar wine offering.

So we're sharing a bottle of pinot noir and there happens to be on the television, the winter olympic's ice skating competition.

My telephone rings and it's Kristie, she asks, "Whatchya doin?"

"Oh, drinking a pinot noir watching ice dancing with the captain"

"Really? Is he gay?"

"Hey Jim, my wife is wondering if you're gay."

"Nope!"

"No, the captain's not gay, hon"

"But that is! Don't do that again, that's just weird!"

That is the funniest thing I've read in a long time!!

May 30th, 2007, 11:59	#4
Chris_Ford Banned Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Phoenix, AZ Posts: 7,329	Re: The Things Kids Say...... Sounds like you have a Chris Jr!!!!!!!!

May 30th, 2007, 13:29	#6
gna_in_lgb Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: LAS - the northern part Posts: 264	Re: The Things Kids Say...... My friend has an eight year-old daughter and a few weeks ago she had a slumber party to celebrate her birthday. So while my friend was preparing some snacks, one of the girls asked her "Ann-Marie, why don't you have a husband" and Ann-Marie's daughter answered "my mom doesn't have a husband because she likes to make all the decisions around here". Eight years old and already has marriage figured out.

May 30th, 2007, 16:43	#7
TheWife Old Skool Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Utah Posts: 4,180	Re: The Things Kids Say...... My 5 year old has been asking for "uppers". We'll be walking around the grocery store and he'll say "mom, I'm tired, I need some uppers". Luckily I figured out what he meant cause that sounded bad...apparently, that's what he calls crutches, he thinks it would be fun to have some crutches and not have to walk and get your feet tired. He also had a talk with my husband once about the tattoo on his ankle. My husband's "brilliant" reply "no, I didn't draw on myself, a guy with a sharp needle and some ink drew on daddy and it's never coming off and it really hurt." A few months later, my son asked "mom, when I'm a daddy, is someone going to draw on me with a needle?" and I said "no, because you are going to the make the right choices and not get a tattoo". (Don't flame for being anti-tattoo, I'm not, but when you are talking to a 5 year old well.....) So a few days later, we are driving home and see a guy getting arrested, and he asks why, and I tell him that the guy made some wrong choices, and he says "did he get a tattoo?" Guess I'm going to have to word things better in the future! __________________ Michelle

June 1st, 2007, 12:06	#14
staplegun Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Park Ridge, IL Posts: 1,091	Re: The Things Kids Say...... This happened when son #1 was in 3rd or 4th grade: I'm on a trip and son #1 comes home from school and asks the wife, "Mom, are you and dad ever going to get divorced?" The wife launches into a long, philosophical treatise on marriage, relationships and the vagaries of life, ending with, "so, no, I dont *think* we're ever going to get divorced..." Son says, "Oh" with a dazed look on his face... I come home the next day and get the same question; "Dad, are you and Mom ever going to get divorced?" "No." "OK, thanks..." and he runs off to play. The wife tells me of her conversation and admits she had blown it, she was tired and he caught her off-guard. All he wanted to hear was that we were OK... Sometimes the simplest answer is the best. Even though my wife's was more "honest," it wasn't what a 4th grader needed to hear... Kevin

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May 29th, 2007, 22:38	#1
JEP Moderator Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Eden Prairie, MN (KFCM) (KMSP) Posts: 10,628 Blog Entries: 1	The Things Kids Say...... my 9 yr old as I am telling him for the umpteenth time to get his teeth brushed for bedtime....... him: "Dad, Are you gay?" me: "WHAT?" him: "Not that kind of gay? The happy kind of gay..." Geez, Dad! __________________ NJC or Bust......tick, tick....