Counting My Blessings

Coney · October 24th, 2006, 23:08

It's about 10:00 PM here. I find myself, as I often do, wondering how I deserve such a wonderful wife. In August of this year, I lost my full-time "real" job at the bank and we decided to make a push to use my newly earned CFI certificate. I now work at a flight school earning a small fraction of the income I once did. Truth is, I can't help but to feel a little loser-ish. I'll be 35 next month, making me the oldest instructor at the flight school. All my friends have good paying jobs, as I once did. My wife knows that I wasn't able to pursue flying very aggresively when I worked at the bank all week long, and it was her idea for me to do this when I lost my job. Thankfully, she works and earns a decent income, and she's behind me all the way. I wish I wasn't so hard on myself right now and that I could pay her back for all these years of support and love.

Can anyone out there relate?

MusketeerMan · October 25th, 2006, 00:21

I hear you man! I have an incredible wife supporting me as well and sometimes I can't believe that she does. I'm 31 and finishing my CFI, so I'm almost in the same boat as you. There's been hard times, but she knows it's what I'm called to do ultimately and is always pushing me at every stage. Started this past January and will hopefully finish up with the instructor ratings this year and finally get that major hurdle out of the way. Are you looking to get to the airlines???

racemey · October 25th, 2006, 00:50

I am with you here. I am 37 and got my CFI in August. This week I start instructing with my flying club and my wife has been very supportive. She knows I am unhappy in my current job and I could not do what I am doing without her support. I am continuing with my current job and will teach on the side as much as I can. If that is as far as I go, then I will always have this.

If you all can make it work and you have her support, don't feel bad about it. I am one of the older instructors at my school, but it feels great to finally be getting paid to do something I enjoy so much. Right now, I am just trying to put ourselves in a position financially where if I find a suitable full time flying position in a year or two, we will be able to take a hit for the first few years. Whatever you, be sure to keep the family first and let her know how much you appreciate the support.

surreal1221 · October 25th, 2006, 05:34

I'm 22 years old, and about to leave the stable environment of the military in about 6 months. I count my blessings each night. My wife has a very nice job right now, and we are saving each of her paychecks while we live on mine for the time being.

Thankfully she is willing to let me change careers and to leave the umbrella of the military. As we both know where I would end up, and what could ultimately happen to me. I hope to be able to repay her back for all the support somehow, perhaps her going back to school in a few years, or buying and building the house we plan on doing.

The occasional thank you card from hallmark works well in our relationship, should try it out.

eastbayk · October 25th, 2006, 10:39

I'm one of those supportive wives. My guy is 35, a total midlife career changer. Currently working non-stop as a CFI to build those hours. We picked up and moved (us and our son) from CA to FL to do this in Jan '06. He never would have done this if it hadn't been for my support.It's been hard, but also a great experience and I'm very proud to see how much he has accomplished.

I bet all of your wives are extremely proud of you as well! It takes so much work to learn all of the new skills and a lot of blind faith to make a jump into a new career, especially one like aviation.

PM me for my blog address if you or your wives want to know what it's been like for us.

K

kellwolf · October 25th, 2006, 11:04

I'm also in the "how did I get so lucky" category with my wife. When a CFI job with a large amount of multi time was offered to me in another state, she's the one that told me to go for it, leaving her AND my 5 month old son in another state living with her parents. It was rough on all of us, but I was able to bust my butt and get the hours in under 7 months, and now we're back under one roof and extremely happy. There's no way I could have EVER gotten this far without her love and support.

juskl · October 25th, 2006, 14:10

What a theme all.... I also am 35 and finally left my full time job of 13 years to finally finish my CFI and do what I really love doing. My wife was wonderful through all of my flying years. Unfortunately we are getting divorced now (probably would have been able to make things better had I done this full time sooner (was a cop for 13 years)).. Anyway though we are getting the big D, I still love her very much and probably can never fully express my gratitude for all of her support. Actually, she was the one who gave me the final shove to follow what we all love.... aviation.

Don't ever feel like a loser (though believe me, I know exactly how you feel)... As long as you are happy and doing what you love, you will be happier, healthier and have a better family life for it.... While those that we used to work with will still be not real happy and probably have a heart attack wayyyy before their time...... Everyone of us deserves a pat on the back for us make the very tough descision to make the leap of faith....., But more importantly cherish those that supported us and never let them forget how important they are to us....... Good luck all.....

MQAAord · October 25th, 2006, 15:18

Wow. What a wonderful change to hear these comments from guys instead of the usual 'stay single women only bring you down in this industry' comments! Thank you. All.

If I can add my thanks, but to my husband who helped me get my PPL after 9/11 when I found myself quite suddenly furloughed, homeless, and broke. With his help and support I was able to train full-time for my PPL. I would probably have ended up working at the 'mill back home (again) instead of pursing a great achievement.

(Oh, and without him, my stuff would never have made it from ORD back to the farm in Wisconsin. He drove the moving truck. Something I've never been brave enough to do

)

I_Money · October 26th, 2006, 01:01

I know that looserish feeling - I am back at school (albiet a top school) and just heard from one of my old friends, he is in London working for UBS in some fancy sounding role. It is funny I used to work at an Investment Bank - HATED IT! Yet I still feel he has his #### together more then, which is strange!

mtsu_av8er · October 28th, 2006, 04:08

Well, I had to deal with a bad apple or two, before I found the one I have now . . .

My wife watched me go from a broke CFI, to a pretty well-paid CFI, to a broke freight dawg, to a pretty well paid freight dawg, and back to being a broke freight dawg - and she still married me!

I will say this, though - if your woman supports you, keep her. If your woman doesn't support you, drop her like a bad habit. She's simply not worth it. It's better to be single, than to be with a woman that doesn't support you 100%. 98% just isn't enough . . .

surreal1221 · October 28th, 2006, 06:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by mtsu_av8er

Well, I had to deal with a bad apple or two, before I found the one I have now . . .

My wife watched me go from a broke CFI, to a pretty well-paid CFI, to a broke freight dawg, to a pretty well paid freight dawg, and back to being a broke freight dawg - and she still married me!

I will say this, though - if your woman supports you, keep her. If your woman doesn't support you, drop her like a bad habit. She's simply not worth it. It's better to be single, than to be with a woman that doesn't support you 100%. 98% just isn't enough . . .

Amen. . . you're in it through the tough. . . so that you can enjoy the good. Have to have 100% otherwise it'll never work.

Kristie · October 30th, 2006, 16:25

I completely agree with that....

X-Forces · November 18th, 2006, 06:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by Coney

I find myself, as I often do, wondering how I deserve such a wonderful wife.

Ahh, my kind of post!!

I have only been married for a few months, but we have been together for 3 years now, and we have a 19 month old son with a girl on the way.

Commercial aviation is stress, hands down no doubt about it, however I hate it when it takes too bad a rap as the catalyst for relationship destruction. After all, how many split up couples have you come across where neither where in aviation? Quite a few I am willing to bet.

Not to try to belittle the negative factor that a career in aviation can have on a relationship, but my point is the same as the one that has already been mentioned in this thread. Support is everything! With the right person by your side you will make it through thick and thin.

I have a very supportive wife. To give you an idea, I am actually going back into aviation to spend MORE time with my family! Give you an idea of how much I am around presently. So it is to say that it is not just about “flying” taking people away from home for long periods, and thus causing relational heartache. There are loads of careers and situations that can torpedo a relationship if the support mechanism is not in place.