Five Years
Posted September 12th, 2009 at 01:23 by ctab5060X
Updated September 12th, 2009 at 17:30 by ctab5060X
Updated September 12th, 2009 at 17:30 by ctab5060X
Five Years
Five years...
What exactly is it? Does anyone really know?
Five years...
Five trips around the sun;
One thousand eight hundred and twenty-six and one quarter days;
Forty-three thousand eight hundred and thirty hours;
Two million six hundred twenty-nine thousand eight hundred minutes;
One hundred fifty-seven million seven hundred and seventy-eight thousand seconds;
A LIFETIME?
Or even an ETERNITY?
A lot can happen to a person in five years. Heartache, sorrow, and pain. Joy, happiness, and satisfaction.
Five years can see the happiest day of your life. It can also see the worst day of your life. It can see your world shattered, yet it can also rebuild your life.
I have seen my world shattered, and although it seems hard to fathom, each year I find that I have picked up a couple of more pieces and put them in place. But I find myself today stopping to view my puzzle. To examine where I have been and to ponder where am I going...
It is a puzzle with no edges or boundaries. There are some areas that are clearly defined and complete - those of the past; yet other area that are void - to be filled with pieces in the years to come. But there is also this very noticeable and inescapable void - a void in the present. This is the void I concentrate on today... for today marks five years.
Five years ago today, the safe and secure world I knew came crashing down around me. The void was created. Throughout the last five years, I have encircled the void as best I could - with memories, happy times, and joyous occasions. But these defenses don't always hold.
Today (Sept 11th), I look at the puzzle that is my life. I ponder it closely, concentrating on the void that is ever present in my life. And yet, I find something strange has happened.
Oh yes, the void is still there, but the edges.... they are no longer rough and full of raw emotion, yet smoothed by new memories and happier memories. Memories forged from the pieces that used to occupy the void before my world was shattered.
It is now, looking at the void in my life that I come to a stark realization...
While five years can seem so long, and yet so short, it can offer us the most important gift of all:
The gift of TIME.
Time to REFLECT...
Time to MOVE FORWARD...
Time to HEAL...
It is here, five years later, that I look at myself and find that I have started to heal.
Healing a wound that on some days - especially today - is gaping and ugly. A wound that will forever leave a scar - my void - on the great puzzle that is my life.
A void that was once filled with a great friend, a teacher and mentor, a wonderful Father who was taken too soon from this world.
September 11, 2004... the day my world forever changed. The day I started down a different path in my life.
Five years...
I look back on where I have been. I gaze one more time on the puzzle that is my life. I then turn and do what I know must be done.
I take a deep breath... and take another step forward on the road that is my future.
Total Comments 1
Comments
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When I went through similar times, my preacher came to see me the day after the accident. He said that this was similar to taking a knife and cutting your arm wide open. At first it bleeds and hurts and looks and feels awful. It's all you can think about. (So true).
Several months (or years) go by and it still feels bad and looks bad and you still think of it a lot.
Twenty years later you will still look at your arm and even though for the most part it has healed and doesn't hurt, you still have that scar.
It's always rough on the anniversary. Just keep your head up and focus on the good times.Posted September 12th, 2009 at 03:53 by t-cart 
