[SeatClutcher]

Originally Posted by bunghole

Your girlfriend isnt being selfish whatsoever! She is straightforward, and for that you really owe her enough respect and dignity to leave the relationship so she can find that person that can fulfill her expectations which by the way are perfectly normal in every way. If anything give her a big hug for being HONEST! Her honesty will save you years of anguish/grief/broken home....etc

P.S. Perhaps in the future you would bring your career goals up on the first date.

Have a nice day

It seems the girlfriend has legitimate concerns. Not everyone WANTS to raise children almost alone, and if she was thinking she would be with someone with a normal schedule, maybe this flying thing has caught her off guard.

There are two people in a relationship, and sometimes, both have a dream. The original post was pretty critical of the girlfriend's:

Then she brings in the "what about when we have kids and What am I suppose to do while you are gone? Have you thought about how this will affect me." You know, those types of complaints.

"Those types"? Those "types of complaints" sounds like perfectly respectable issues.

I try to tell her that there have been thousands before us that have lived a successful, happy life.

There are thousands of people who have made happy, successful lives working 9-5 and living behind a white picket fence, too.

She's all whacked out/pissed off that I'm wanting to do this. It's almost as though she is a bit selfish.

Who would be the one most likely to end up spending a lot of time at home taking care of the kids?

How is she being selfish? And how would you describe your post explaining what she wants out of life, and your reaction to what she wants?

I mean I can understand where she is coming from and yes, it would suck to not be there everyday, but you know, she is in school doing what she wants to do. Granted, it's not a career that would have her gone half of each week...

Well, no...not "granted"....that's the thing of it, isn't it? The two are very different. I understand why you feel like she's asking you to give up your dreams while living hers, but right now, you don't have kids (do you?). She's going to school before a career. That's different from having the kids and being home alone with them a lot of the time.

Imagine your roles reversed. Imagine you and she have a talk about the future and she tells you, "I've always wanted to be a doctor. I won't be home much - hardly at all, actually, for a few years, and after that I'll always be on call, so if you want kids, I hope you're prepared to be the primary caregiver."

What if you had previously thought you two would be sharing the child-rearing work pretty evenly?

it's seem to come down to the "give me what I want" mentality from her and anything else just ain't gonna cut it.

Maybe she just knows what kind of life she wants.

If that's her mentality, how would you describe yours? What if she doesn't give you what YOU want? Will anything else cut it, or do you have expectations about your life that simply aren't easily negotiable?

I guess I'll eventually be put into submission and end up staying in the teaching/coaching career til the day I die.

Better to have her be put into submission and end up going along with the kind of life you want until the day she dies, eh?

Rather than either of you "submitting" (or, losing something of yourself and becoming resentful, if both of your feelings about your lifestyle expectations are that strong), you might end up having to accept a break up could make both of you happier than you might be if you stay together. Love don't always mean it's right, if you know what I'm sayin'.

Good luck.